Divorce Court
I’m writing this blog post from a courthouse in New York City. Ay dios mio, you must be wondering why the hell I’m in here.
It all comes down to a bad break-up…with my former roommate. She’s taking me to court for an “illegal lockout”dispute. Forget the fact that home girl hasn’t lived in my apartment in over a year and is not even on the lease, she’s loca!
I’m scared in this court and I don’t really deserve to be in here, but sometimes life isn’t fair. I was good friends with my former roommate and now it’s turned into cold stares outside the courtroom and lawsuits.
I was raised never to hate anyone in my life. And even though this crazy beyatch is taking me to court-I still don’t hate her. It reminds me of when a guy you love turns out to be totally different than you ever thought and all of a sudden you see an awful side to him, but she was my friend, not a boyfriend.
I did once date this guy who was still living with his ex-girlfriend (which he never told me about)! He was also AWOL from the Army and of course, I didn’t receive this memo until much later either. Same guy told me I would never become a writer; that was when I knew it was time to end the relationship. He never bothered to return any of my vintage dresses, fancy lingerie, or beloved books even though I asked him several times.
[This is me after my last break-up. Sad, right?]
I’m going to sound like a hippie but I try to love everyone in my life. And it’s utterly disappointing when people let you down.
Do I have too much faith in humanity? Should I become less trusting of boyfriends, roommates and people in my life in general? I’m latina and I don’t ever want to be known as cold-hearted. Like the saying goes, “It is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all,” right? Have you ever had an experience that made you lose faith in the people around you?
[Me, in better spirits.]
Un Abrazo Fuerte,
Lex
Okay for reals, our parallel lives are starting to scare me. I had to get a restraining order against my former friend-slash-roommate after we threw down because she was prostituting via craigslist and using my room to do the deed when I was gone at work. I ended up in the hospital with 10 stitches on my forehead (homechick did some time and knows how to fight) and had to move out in a matter of 24 hours for fear of my life. But to this day, I don’t hate her. I know she’s lived a harder life than me and I try to thank my blessings every chance I get. To quote a magnet I have hanging on my fridge after breaking up with a live-in boyfriend: “It is better to have loved and lost than to have lived with the psycho the rest of your life.”
That’s just crazy! I guess she had nothing better to do or hoped you would shout her out on your blog.
I hope everything turns out well and she’s not trying to get you for an indecent amount of money! What a waste of time. Like you didn’t have anything to do but sit in a courtroom all day.
As far as being too trusting, I believe you have to trust people to an extent. You can’t go around life thinking everyone is an ass-face. I rather give someone a little trust and see what they do with it. If they go a bogus route then you know to move on and let them be. You can’t hate people, that just keeps you in a bad place. But you can hate on people, there is a difference.
I had a best friend through h.s. and into to our early 20’s, we were cool as hell as long as she didn’t have a man and even better when we both didn’t have one. For some reason any guy that I messed around w/ that she knew would at some point (usually after I stopped messing w/ them) was trying to get with her. And this is according to her, I used to believe her and be like go ahead get yours because ain’t no guy worth your bestfriend. I noticed as we got older that she would put our friendship to the side for any sausage that would talk to her so I choose to part paths. I moved to another state and when she found out I was moving she wanted to hang out again. I just let it go. I ain’t upset, I just hope her life goes well but I know I ain’t try’n to be in it.
WOW…these stories are fascinating…thanks for sharing them. I’m glad I’m not the only one who has experience mala amigas y hombres in her life!!!
I love you all!!!
Lex
Good luck with that! I mean it. Your right you really can’t hate everyone, but you should learn that you shouldn’t trust everyone. There’s a difference. I’m sure you’ll only grow stronger from this experience, and therefore it will make you a powerful person for knowing this knowledge. Good luck to you. And have fun while your there!!
This is terrible! Was she trying to break in to your apartment? Something similar happened to a friend and it was really scary. Your landlord should be protecting you though! I hope everything works out ok.
I get those feelings all the time. I think that I must have “sucka” written on my forehead at times because some people that I have called friends and treated better than family have let me down in the worst ways. When I moved in with my boyfriend a couple years ago I sold a lot of my furniture, an ex-amiga told me she’d buy my couch so I sold it to her for $100, me & my boyfriend even delivered it to her house & set it up for her. She stiffed me on a little less than 1/2 the money & made up some fake argument to get out of paying the rest. It was so sad because I would’ve worked something out with her-she didn’t have to start an argument for $40. I felt horrible for a long time & lost trust in people, but then I realized that what goes around comes around so her anger & negativity would never bring me happiness. When people like that come along you just need to thank God for the example of what NOT to be like & pray for Him to keep you from ever becoming like that.
I enjoy reading all these stories.. and have respect for the courage it takes to tell it all.
I too love everyone in my life and not in my life.. but I find that you need to protect yourself from negativity and bad spirits just by being aware of who and how they work… and you could still love them and pray for without putting yourself in harms way…
Peace,
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